Establishing Lasting Ejaculatory Control
Practice sessions should continue on a regular basis to maintain ejaculatory control.
1. Use the squeeze technique at least once a week for the next six months.
2. Once each month practice the squeeze technique for an entire twenty-minute session.
3. Good ejaculatory control is usually attained in three to six weeks.
4. Within six to twelve months the husband should be able to be consistently quite active in intercourse for ten to twenty minutes without ejaculation.
5. Complete control is attained when the husband does not have his orgasm until he chooses.
Prolonged emphasis on controlling orgasm in these practice sessions may sometimes cause a husband to have a temporary lack of ability to keep an erection. Do not be dismayed. It is just this portion of the husband’s body demanding a brief rest. Read the rest of this entry »
Phase V. - Июль 29th, 2009
The objective of this phase: To learn how to have comfortable sexual intercourse in the side-to-side (lateral) position. This position gives better control of movements by both husband and wife and allows the husband the best ejaculatory control.
1. Spend some time in loving foreplay.
2. Again assume the position of the wife straddling the husband and leaning forward to insert his penis.
3. Place a pillow under the husband’s head and another one along his left side.
4. The wife brings her right leg to a straight position between his legs. She leaves her left leg on the outer side of his body.
5. At the same time, the husband moves his left leg out from his body, placing it flat on the bed, with knee bent.
6. The wife is to shift her entire body slightly to the right, while leaning forward with her left breast at the level of his left breast. She will now be partially supported by the pillow at her husband’s left side. Additional comfort is achieved by another pillow for her head and shoulders.
7. It will take several practice sessions to learn to change easily into this side-to-side position and arrange the arms and legs in the most comfortable manner. (Once learned, this position is used by many couples most of the time.)
8. While in the side-to-side position, the thrusting should be gentle, so that the penis can remain in the vagina for twenty minutes before ejaculation.
Remember, it is important to wait at least one day before beginning a new phase. The objective of this phase: To be able to keep the erect penis in the vagina with very gentle movements for about twenty minutes before ejaculation.
1. Spend some time in loving foreplay.
2. Again assume the position of the wife straddling the husband and leaning forward to insert his penis.
3. The husband is to begin thrusting slightly, thus learning to tolerate gradually increasing amounts of movement of the penis in the vagina.
4. This gentle thrusting should be continued for fifteen to twenty minutes before ejaculation. Use the squeeze technique if necessary.
5. When this phase is mastered, the husband may now ejaculate with the penis in the vagina, but he is to continue concentrating on his own sensations, until each practice session is over and he has ejaculated. Then he is to take time to manually bring his wife to orgasm. (Remember, this is still a training session.)
The objective of this phase: For the erect penis to remain almost motionless in the vagina for fifteen to twenty minutes before ejaculation.
1. The husband lies on his back, and the wife stimulates him to an erection.
2. When he feels he is nearing the point of ejaculation, he signals his wife, and she quickly uses the squeeze technique.
3. She should repeat the stimulation almost to ejaculation and then squeeze the penis. This should be done several times.
4. Then the wife straddles the husband in a sitting position. Leaning forward at about a 45-degree angle, she very gently and slowly inserts the erect penis into the well-lubricated vagina, then moves backward comfortably onto the shaft, not just sitting down on it.
5. She remains motionless, giving her husband a chance to achieve control. If the husband loses his erection while the penis is in the vagina, the wife should raise her body and manually restimulate him to erection.
6. If the husband becomes aware that he is nearing the point of ejaculation, he should indicate this to his wife, so that she can raise her body and repeat the squeeze procedure. Then she gently reinserts the penis.
7. Husband and wife should be able to maintain this position with the erect penis almost motionless in the vagina for fifteen to twenty minutes before ejaculation.
The objective of this phase: For the husband to learn to recognize the physical sensation that comes just before ejaculation, so that he is able to communicate to his wife the best time to apply the squeeze.
During this session it is vitally important that the husband concentrate completely on his own sensations. He is to block out all other thoughts, so that he will become keenly aware of the feeling that comes just prior to ejaculation. It may help if he closes his eyes. As soon as the husband feels he is nearing the point of ejaculation, he is to indicate this to his wife by some predetermined word or signal. She is then to quickly use the squeeze technique. This phase should be repeated during the daily practice sessions, until the husband can consistently recognize the sensation that occurs just before ejaculation (see figure). Read the rest of this entry »
Phase I. - Июль 24th, 2009
You may both be so “gun-shy” from the husband’s quick sexual release that you have been avoiding touching as much as possible. You need to take the focus off orgasm and timing and concentrate on improving nonverbal, physical communication without seeking to reach orgasm. The objective of this phase: To improve physical communication and learn to appreciate physical closeness with your mate.
1. Spend time touching and fondling each other.
2. Do the things that physically please your mate, such as a scalp massage or stroking the back or neck, and so forth.
3. Avoid directly stimulating genital areas.
4. Do not have intercourse, but focus on improving physical communication with your mate.
5. Learn to appreciate and enjoy physical closeness.
6. Follow this procedure for at least the first two sessions.
Because premature ejaculation can be the primary cause of the woman’s orgasmic dysfunction, we will discuss ejaculatory control first. Specifically, the term describes the husband who ejaculates before entering his wife’s vagina, or ejaculates immediately after entry. It also refers to the husband’s inability to control ejaculation for a sufficient length of time during intravaginal containment to satisfy his wife in at least 50 percent of their times of sexual intercourse. In other words, the husband arrives at ejaculation before he wishes to do so.
One main cause of premature ejaculation is poor learning at the beginning of marriage. A new husband who has built up great tension through the period of courtship and engagement may ejaculate when he takes his wife in his arms on their wedding night, and for many nights thereafter. Some men mistakenly feel that a quick release is a sign of masculinity. Thus they never realize the need to learn to control the timing of their ejaculation so that they can experience the joy and oneness that comes with consistently bringing the wife to orgasm during intercourse.
The problem of premature ejaculation is occasionally established from sexual experiences before marriage. Heavy petting with stimulation to ejaculation can form a hurried pattern of love-making. Premarital intercourse instills guilt about the sex act itself, and in such furtive acts there is the constant pressure to “get it over with” before discovery. This pattern of hurried ejaculation will usually continue after marriage, until the husband realizes that there is a need to change. A good sexual adjustment is always a learned experience. It does not come naturally. Read the rest of this entry »
Couples hoping for good sexual adjustment in marriage are dismayed early in their relationship when, instead of pleasure, they find problems in their lovemaking. There are two basic problems, and virtually every couple encounters one or both of them, at least at the beginning. These are not as complex or as hard to solve as one might think. The real problem lies in the fact that these difficulties are often ignored or excused, until poor adjustment becomes an accepted, expected part of the sexual relationship. Read the rest of this entry »
Picture this final phase according to the poetic term one doctor has given it—afterglow. After intercourse is over, the fires of passion and pleasure settle down to a lovely, quiet glow. Let this be a time when the husband shows tenderness toward his wife with hugs, kisses, and love pats. The couple should continue to express their appreciation as they lie close in each other’s arms and just enjoy each other’s presence. This ensures a smooth transition to complete relaxation together. It may be as long as fifteen minutes before all the physical signs of arousal are gone, and in a younger man it may be as long as a half hour before the erection completely disappears. Read the rest of this entry »
The term orgasm comes from the Greek word orge meaning excitement. In the woman, it has been described as a momentary feeling of suspension, followed by a sensation of warmth starting in the perineal area and pervading the entire body. Rhythmic contractions of the lower third of the vagina follow. There may be from three to ten contractions over the period of a few seconds. She can increase the intensity of the physical sensations by voluntarily strengthening her P.C. muscle contractions and adding her own pelvic movements to her husband’s, as she lets herself go in seeking release. As her physical movements, her response to her partner’s stimulation, and her own mental concentration blend into a total reaching for satisfaction, she comes to climax—often an emotional mountain-peak experience, when the rest of the world recedes and seems to stand still—a high point of feeling, best described as ecstasy. Read the rest of this entry »
To Ed Wheat Sr. and Gladys Gibson Wheat, whose commitment, devotion, warmth, generosity, and integrity stood for fifty years as a beautiful picture of genuine agape love.